There is a space between a stimulus and a reaction.

If we are able to slow down our thoughts enough, we can sit there, ever so briefly, allowing ourselves time to respond rather than just react. It can be as simple as a long deep breath, or physically stepping away from a situation momentarily. It is a process that brings awareness to the present moment and gives us time to better understand our emotions.

Throughout my recovery I have become painfully aware of my anger. In addiction I was oblivious to it. I would become enraged, respond with anger, sarcasm and aggression to anything I perceived as hurtful.

In sobriety I am learning to take that breath. When I am able to slow down I can see that a “condescending comment from a co-worker” is not a personal attack, I see that other people’s actions are a reflection of themselves, not of me. I can choose how, and if, I will respond.

The practice was extremely difficult at first, but with time it has become easier. I am able to take refuge in these small moments. These moments happen over and over throughout my day. I feel in better control of myself, less reactive and more at peace.

It is far from perfect. I do have moments where I am not able to slow down, where my emotions get the better of me. But I am usually able to at least look back on it and see what happened more clearly.

I will continue to try and take that split second, slow down, and breathe.